If there were to be no tomorrow, what would you do today?
I would wake up early and watch the sunrise. I would call CSG and tell him that we’re spending all our money that day. I would then rush out and get a wedding dress, rings, get my hair and nails done and then get married to CSG. Then, we’d go to a fancy restaurant (with our wedding clothes still on) and get a steak with ice cream. I would make sure to watch the sunset that night as it was going to be the last one ever. Then, CSG and I would consummate our marriage and play the game of life and watch TV until the world ended.
That sounds like an absolutely wonderful day.
So, I am watching What Not to Wear and there is this episode with an ex-stripper and she had horrible self-esteem and she just wanted to stand out and be beautiful. Now, she keeps reiterating that she never thought she could be “this beautiful”. It’s amazing how this show can really transform lives. I know, I know. it’s a TLC fashion show, but I for one know how great it feels to have confidence and feel beautiful. This show is really great.
As for my life, I am moving back home for the month because my sister got me a job at her work!! It’s a job doing science-y things which is amazing because it pays well and it looks great on my resume. Also, moving back home will help my family out a lot since my dad can no longer work. His surgery is in 8 days. He was just put on pain medication because on Friday he was withering in pain. Poor guy. He is literally just skin and bones. He’s the skinniest man I have ever seen. I hate seeing him like this. It makes me so sad, so I’ll probably be depressed this whole month. Sorry. Not to mention that CSG will still be here. I’ll have to come out on weekends.
There is good news though! CSG and I are going camping this weekend!! I am so excited. He said we’re going to go on a boat ride and go to the beach and camp under the stars. It will be my first time camping. I hope it goes well. We’ll have been dating for two years! However, I think the most amazing feat is that we’ve been talking every day for three years. We always make sure to talk to each other every day and just hear what’s going on with each other. Even when I was not going to the same college. This relationship is amazing.
Hope July went as you hoped. Get ready for August!!
What’s your favorite story?
Well, stories can mean a lot of different things. I am going to list my favorite play, novel, and movie.
Play: I absolutely adore RENT (I’ve seen the actual play 6 times), but I’ve already mentioned that one before. Another play I love is The Importance of Being Ernest. It is witty and underrstandable. Just a funny, well written play all around.
Novel: This is a tough one. I’m going to sneak out of this one and just say Harry Potter. I think the fourth book is my favorite. My least favorite is definitely the fifth book, but that’s just because Umbridge is the most evil and easiest person to hate ever. J.K Rowling did an amazing job at creating that character.
Movie: I have always loved The Little Mermaid, as well as, The Princess Bride. I obviously love princesses. The Little Mermaid is just a classic (and in my opinion the best) princess movie. Recently, my little nieces have started watching it every time they go to Grandma’s house. It is adorable because it used to be me and my cousin’s favorite movie. The Princess Bride is awesome with the way that there is romance, action, and comedy. It has something for everyone.
As for my dad side of things, I am scared. I will fully admit that to loving strangers, but I cannot seem to talk about it at all in real life. I want to tell my dad things, but I just can’t. I have never been able to tell my dad things- he always heard about my life through my mom. It is just understood that he loves me, I love him and we don’t have to talk about it. We just make small talk. I make him laugh, he makes me laugh. Now, I don’t know. He’s done so much to just hurt my family. He cheated on my mom, he didn’t get a vasectomy (hence why I was born), he smokes and drinks and he doesn’t help around the house. My mom always said that he makes the money and that is well and good, but he should still help around the house! My mom works, she takes care of all of us children, she cooks, she cleans. It’s just not fair.
I always thought my mom was so independent and awesome, but my dad cheated on her (and from the sound of it- it was a lot) and yet, she kept him around. I guess he is the primary breadwinner and I guess that’s why she kept him around, but seriously, in a divorce you can get child support.
I don’t want to end up like them. Neither of them are happy and yet, they stay together. My mom always makes fun of me because I stayed in my last relationship too long, but I just want to be like you have never broken up with someone, you don’t know what it’s like! And you stayed with a guy who cheated on you.
40 years of marriage and for what?
What are your strengths that get you through hard times?
I think this is an excellent question for the time in my life right now. Obviously my answer is my family (namely my mom and my sister) and CSG, but I have come to find that ice cream and Gilmore Girls helps whenever I am feeling down and out. Ice cream is just that right mix of coolness and sweetness whereas Gilmore Girls is funny, but it has some sad relatable parts to it as well. Just last night I woke CSG up crying because I was (still am) worried about my father’s condition. We ended up staying up till 3AM, which was a very bad idea seeing as he has to work an eight hour day today starting at 8:30. However, he does get to sleep in tomorrow.
I have a second interview tomorrow for a large retail store. I guess I’m excited about it. Really, I just want a job. Not only for the money, but I hate just lounging around here all day. I have been reading a lot of books. In fact, I went to the library Monday and I have finished two of my books and I can’t wait to get started on my other one.
As for right now, I have nothing else to say really. I hope to start updating more often. I really am a slacker. I am going to take a nice nap. Goodnight.
PS- Did you realize that relatable isn’t a word? You learn something new every day. It should be!
My dad
My dad just went in for the surgical consult and the surgeons said they will have to remove most of his pancreas and his whole spleen. His surgery is August 5th (CSG and I’s anniversary) and he has to spend 5 days in the hospital (the longest he has ever been out of work probably). He needs to at least lessen his drinking otherwise; the surgery will have been rendered useless. Of course with surgery there is always a chance that he may bleed out, or because he waited so long, the disease could have spread. In that case, they would just close him back up because there is nothing else they could do.
I am scared and don’t like talking about it one bit.
Questions soon. Been real lazy.
